Sweatshirts I've Worn & Loved
How many crewnecks is too many?
It started with a scissoring sweatshirt.
You see, I’ve got a PhD in queer young adult literature and during the five years or so that I took researching and analysing lesbian love stories in YA, I also spent a lot of time over at Autostraddle.com: the best place on the internet. The website’s roll call of writers kept me up-to-date on the latest new lesbian and bi books as well as served as a brain break in between my 45s.1
A couple years into my programme, Autostraddle launched a new set of merch, which included the now iconic scissoring design.2 I don’t remember ordering it per se, but I do know that the reaction was immediate and that, once arrived, it did not leave my body for much of the following year, thanks in part to the British weather. Wearing the sweatshirt in an academic setting made me laugh—A visual sex joke in the halls of the English Department? No one ever mentioned it—but it was the confused responses that were even better: Was I a hairdresser? Was I crafty? Was it because I make quilts? Cute scissor design! Has your roommate seen it?
I loved my red marl scissoring sweatshirt so much that when Autostraddle later released a dark grey version with red and blue scissors I bought a second one. Ultimately, as these things sometimes happen, the dark grey didn’t suit me so I sold it on to my friend and fellow PhD’er Sarah Pyke (who gets a full name drop because the work she does on materiality, children’s books, and oral histories is awesome). Nonetheless, my new love for queer-coded crew neck sweatshirts was born, and my interest was about to get a significant style boost.
Enter Isabel Waidner. Before I went through my PhD upgrade process at the University of Roehampton, I watched Isabel go through theirs. Attending a lunchtime talk they gave about their first novel3 Gaudy Bauble, I was, to be completely honest, somewhat distracted from what they were saying by the sweatshirt they were wearing. First of all, this was an official part of our programme, something for which I had been preparing for with trousers and a blazer in mind. Isabel and I are from similar class backgrounds, but I still had the fear in me about looking ‘professional’ (i.e. boring) or ‘putting my best foot forward’ (maybe my Americanness coming through). There was no way I would have ever shown up to such an important lecture wearing a sweatshirt. AND YET, they looked amazing! So professional! So comfortable! So themselves! Second of all, I wanted to know where they got that sweatshirt from. Where did one find a cool, geometric, multi-fabric piece like that??
Thus began my quest to build a collection.
Here are my Top 6 Sweatshirts of the last decade, complete with ridiculous in-jokes and innuendo (inspired by a request from a few readers). It might just make the sweatshirt that started Call Me Mama make even more sense now.
Carol Season
When the 2015 film Carol came out in cinemas, a little part of my sapphic heart was restored. I have a complicated relationship to TV and movies, and I don’t think it’ll get a lot of air time in this newsletter (it’s way more complicated than the ‘bury your gays’ trope), but this film hit so many levels for me: a lesbian love story with a happy(ish) ending, 1950s Americana, the cinematography, the clothing, the adaptation from a classic novel with an excellent backstory. We went to see it in the movie theatre twice that winter. I was smitten.
Then there was the online fandom. Autostraddle has a lot to answer for there as well—post after post, reference after reference—but there were also random stories around, like this classic meme: ‘Harold, they’re lesbians.’ (The internet culture around Carol was so unique, Daisy Jones even dedicated a whole chapter to it in her book on lesbian and bi culture.) All of this swooning and hilarity online culminated into the real-life desire to throw our own queer Carol-themed Christmas party: Carolmas.
And that initial idea has meant that for five out of the last six years, we’ve thrown a Carolmas party to the joy and delight of ourselves and many friends. The one year we didn’t host was because we had a newborn—I so wanted to thrown one with a babe-in-arms and have the invite say something about a baby ‘flung out of space’—and my wife gifted me this sweatshirt from the excellent Instagram account @godimsuchadyke. The only reason this sweatshirt is #6 on this list is because I can only wear it for the 4-6 weeks of Carol Season each year…
Wrangler
In all honesty, this one is a surprise entry on the list. It’s my most recent acquisition and, on the face of it, may just seem like branded vintage swag. Except for the fact that it makes me feel so butch. Like, this last year I have been really figuring out the elements of a butch aestethic that sing for me, and it’s often the ways in which I can evoke a sense of rural America. This is weird because I wouldn’t have ever worn actual Wranglers when I lived in Siskiyou County, and yet wearing this sweatshirt in London makes me feel like I can give off a ‘not from round here’ vibe without having to open my mouth. It’s complicated, but I’m leaning into it. Plus, I got it for free from a friend when they were moving and it’s made me so happy ever since.
California
I love my home state of California, which was probably clear from the previous newsletter, too. As far as places to be from, this one carries with it a lot of mythology—which is how even just the name of it alone embroidered on a sweatshirt can be sold by the classic high street Mum chain Marks & Spencers as new and trendy.
For me, it was the colour that sold it. That Kelly Green is so rich! My wife and I saw it at the same time in the shop and immediately said, ‘Yep, that’s coming home with us.’ She then successfully hid it in her closet for three months until my birthday, at which point I’d forgotten about it. Bonus! It’s cosy and colourful with clean lines and it cracks me up when people (usually customers in the bookshop where I work) ask me where I’m from and I can just point to my chest.
My favourite story about wearing this sweatshirt, though, is from last autumn. My manager and I were invited to a fashion show by Erdem, a customer of ours, about which I was very excited but also nervous. What does a person who doesn’t work in fashion wear to a fashion show?! As it happened, fashion writer Charlie Porter stopped by the shop on the day I had started worrying about this, so I asked his advice. ‘What you’re wearing,’ came the reply. ‘Charlie,’ I said, ‘I can’t wear a M&S sweatshirt and black jeans to London Fashion Week!’ ‘Why not?’ Of course, the next day I started reading his book on the philosophy of fashion and his advice made a lot more sense—but I still didn’t wear the sweatshirt.
Wild Feminist
This one is pretty straightforward: in this day and age, why wouldn’t I want the words ‘Wild Feminist’ on my chest? Such is the genius of the Portland-based clothing company Wildfang. Thanks to my wife, I own not one but two of their crewneck sweatshirts: the classic black and white, and the one above with the rose patch. I can wear this one on pretty much any day and in any context and it’s a comfort to know an item like this exists in my life. It’s also an extra delight when some unsuspecting person—my father-in-law, perhaps—gets up real close to read the words, and then doesn’t know what to do once they’ve said ‘Wild Feminist’ out loud.
Matching Dog/Human Set, aka Katy Perry Cotton Candy Teen Dream4
Ok, I have a confession to make: I’m not a dog person. I’m not really a pet person. Like, I can be very into other people’s animals—I’m down for playtime, I’ll throw a ball, I show up with treats, I’m even OK with the occasional poop-scoop—but I don’t feel the need for one in my home. Some would say this makes me callous and cold-hearted; I would say this makes me an excellent Dog Auntie.
My evidence for this: I have legitimately purchased the above set of MATCHING DOG AND HUMAN SWEATSHIRTS for me and my friends’ dog, Sid. The backstory is that the dogs’ parents (founders of the epic Cipher Press) bought the same one when Sid was a puppy and I flat out coveted this hoodie until they told me I could get a matching one. At which point I bought one for me and one in the next size up for when the pup grew up.
I’m honestly just waiting for my best friend Kate to get her first dog so I can also buy us matching sweatshirts (maybe this one?) or maybe I just buy this one for me on my own…
Scissoring — it’s made a comeback
I’ll be honest, this beloved sweatshirt is a decade old now and it shows. With new, crisper options in my wardrobe, it’s often forgotten or overlooked—for work, for weekends, for casual meet-ups. Recently, though, I threw it on for a kid-parent playdate with my toddler’s best friend, who also happens to have two mums. Within minutes of being in their home, her mama looked at me and laughed, ‘Great jumper.’ I beamed and thought: the old girl’s still got it.
What other sweatshirt could be top of the list?
One of the best things that I came away with from my PhD process was learning to work in 45 minute bursts. There’s the Pomodoro method, sure, but 25 minutes didn’t seem like enough time. In addition, I had a vague memory of my Intro to Feminisms Professor Bettina Aptheker telling her giant auditorium of students that their attention span would only last 45 minutes and that’s when we would have a break in class. I started to apply this to my working pattern and loved it. And then I got my fellow PhD’ers to join in with me. By the end of it, we called ourselves The Mighty 45.
As well as an academic, Isabel is also now a prize-winning novelist. Their books Corey Fah Does Social Mobility and We are Made of Diamond Stuff are some of my favourite (truly bonkers, deeply queer, fantastically political) novels.
I am loving the sweatshirts - although I would probably wouldn’t call them that because I have no fashion knowledge and lump anything thicker than a t-shirt into that very English word ‘jumper’ (apart from cardigans and tank tops of course - now there’s a topic for debate!). Sadly, I do now suit a crew neck. Also so lovely to commune with the old Roehampton crew through your writing, Erica. Thank you for sharing.